Why is it that so many franchise finales occurred in 2019? We got Endgame, we got Dark Phoenix (which wasn’t a finale per se, but it also kinda was, it sucked nonetheless), we got Game of Thrones season 8, we got Toy Story 4, we got It Chapter 2, we got The Rise of Skywalker, and now, finally, we got Crisis on Infinite Earths, the sort-of finale for 8 years of CW television. And its... fine. It begins pretty great and ends pretty great and has a pretty nifty cliff-hanger in the middle and a pretty nifty resolution to that cliffhanger but everything else is kinda meh.
I’m not going to go over the plot of all five episodes but perhaps the biggest misstep of the crossover is to kill off Oliver Queen in the first episode. Sure it works in the context of that episode but it really just makes him a minor part of the crossover that’s supposed to kill him off. Then the next two episodes just kinda meander around for a bit and then the multiverse ends. The whole crossover is obviously trying to emulate Infinity War and Endgame but it doesn’t quite get that to tell a good story you can’t just bank on cameos and call backs. Infinity War worked so well because Thanos had a very specific goal that would lead to him destroying half of all life and the Avengers were trying to stop him. The Anti-monitor only shows up briefly now and then, and his only goal is to just destroy universes. We don’t know how he does it, we don’t know why he’s doing it, and we don’t have any reason to believe that it can be stopped. So for episodes two and three go on little fetch quests throughout the multiverse, while the Anti-monitor is, you know, destroying WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING UNIVERSES. And they kinda just don’t care about each other.
And then the big cliffhanger happens, and it’s pretty awesome. Now that the “seven paragons” had been found, we could finally get onto some good guys fighting some actual bad guys like what we got in the first episode. And also Lex (Jonathan Cryer) sneaks in! Which has the potential to throw another wrench into the crossover. And, I mean, they almost do that. The fourth episode begins pretty great with Ryan Choi narrating what everybody has been up to for the past couple months stranded in nowhere and it’s pretty great. And then Spectre (Stephen Amell) and he speaks in this comically deep voice. Like, he just sounds stupid. But he gives Barry (Grant Gustin) an upgrade and now they’re able to go fight the Anti-Monitor at the dawn of time. But they’ll also stop by the Monitor’s backstory for a bit, which, you know, SHOULDN’T EXIST BECAUSE ALL OF THE MULTIVERSE HAS BEEN DESTROYED. Also there’s this finale’s version of the time heist where they glance back at moments of Arrow’s history. It’s fine. It’s no where near good. Then they all fight the Anti-Monitor and his shadow demons while shouting the cheesiest, stupidest lines. Also Ryan Choi is fighting these things with his fists? Sure. And then Oliver beats the Anti-Monitor and the multiverse is re-booted and everything is fine.
BUT NOT ACTUALLY!!!
Yeah, the Anti-Monitor is not actually dead so they fight him in this new universe and then they shrink him a lot and everything’s actually okay. They really just wanted that fifth episode didn’t they?
I jest, but actually the fifth episode is pretty great. Thank god for Legends of Tomorrow writers who actually know how to write good dialogue. This is perhaps the only episode of the crossover that actually managed to pull some emotional resonance out of Oliver’s death. And they did the same thing two years ago with Martin Stein. Honestly, the CW should just quit all other shows and pool their resources into Legends because it is easily the best show they have. Also Beebo shows up. I don’t know why he showed up. But I loved every minute of his cuddly goodness.
Now back to the ranting.
Then, because every character is now on “Earth Prime” they set up a super-hero (name still pending) in remembrance of Oliver’s death. Barry just kinda brings every one into this large warehouse that he owns and shows them a kinda cool table so they all sit around it and smile for a bit. Like I get it’s supposed to be sweet and also satisfying for all the DC fans that have been wanting a good live-action Justice League for a while, but THEY’RE LITERALLY JUST SITTING AT A TABLE WITH SHOTS OF THEM SMILING. IT LOOKS LIKE A COMMERCIAL FOR FANCY TABLES!!!!! THAT’S IT!!!
So yeah, Crisis on Infinite Earths. It’s dumb. Like don’t get me wrong, there’s some real clever parts and some obvious thought went into a story outline and everything else is dumb. But it is enjoyable and definitely worth the watch, especially if you’ve already put in the work of watching literally all the episodes before this for all the series.
Personal Rating: 6/10
Enjoyment: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ ☆
Depth: ⭐️ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
Story: ⭐️⭐️ ☆ ☆ ☆
Comedy: ⭐️⭐️⭐️ ☆ ☆
Tension: ⭐️ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
Directing: ⭐️⭐️⭐️ ☆ ☆
Acting: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ ☆
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